airplane – Topical Fruit

The Three Germiest Spots in Airports and on Planes

Everyone worries about getting sick from that stale, recirculated air on planes. But what you really have to worry about is the stuff you touch.

A study looked at how many bacteria and fungal cells there were on different surfaces.

Here are the top three things to worry about on the plane:

1. The “flush” button in the airplane bathroom. On average, they have about 95,000 CFUs per square inch. That stands for “colony-forming units.” 95,000 is almost five times as much bacteria as you’ll find in the average kitchen sink.

2. Your tray table, just under 12,000 CFUs.

3. Your seat belt. Specifically the buckle. Just over 1,000 CFUs.

But the thing you really need to worry isn’t on the plane.

It’s one of the first things you touch at the airport. Here are three things to worry about before you board:

1. The self check-in kiosks. The screens had an average of 254,000 CFUs. So almost three times as many as the “flush” button. And one they tested had over a million.

2. The armrests on the chairs at your gate, 22,000 CFUs. That’s slightly higher than what you’d find in a kitchen sink.

3. The button on water fountains, 19,000 CFUs.

If the pandemic taught us anything, it’s that the easiest way to limit your exposure to germs is to wash your hands frequently… avoid touching your face… and wear a mask if you’re sick to avoid spreading it to others. And there’s always the option of wearing a mask yourself, if you don’t trust your fellow Americans to keep their germs to themselves.

Variety’s Top 20 Comedy Movies Spark Outrage After “Airplane!” Lands at #62

If you want to start a fight in a group chat, just ask everyone to name the greatest comedy movie of all time.

Variety apparently did exactly that, then poured gasoline on the internet by ranking Airplane! at a criminally low #62. Sixty. Two. At that point, why even make a list? But hey, their Top 20 still gives plenty to argue about, especially if you’re into classic comedies, cult favorites, or movies your parents insist “you just had to be there” to appreciate.

For anyone Googling best comedy movies, top comedy films ever, or funniest movies of all time, here’s what Variety says belongs at the top of the pile.

Their number one pick is The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! and honestly, that’s a choice with big goofy energy.

Leslie Nielsen’s deadpan genius absolutely deserves recognition, even if we can debate whether it’s the single greatest comedy ever made. Right behind it is Some Like It Hot, the 1959 classic that’s still quoted, referenced, and studied today. Billy Wilder fans are celebrating, teenagers everywhere are shrugging, and film professors are pumping their fists in victory.

Meanwhile, Annie Hall sits at #3, followed by The Great Dictator at #4, proving the list leans heavily on iconic, influential films, not just the ones that make you spit out your drink laughing. By the time you hit the middle of the Top 10, the list really starts to feel like a comedy hall of fame: Waiting for Guffman, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Duck Soup, Fargo, Young Frankenstein, and Groundhog Day. This is basically the comedy starter pack for anyone who wants to pretend they’re serious about cinema.

Spot #11 goes to Buster Keaton’s silent-era masterpiece Sherlock Jr., which probably delighted exactly three cinephiles while confusing everyone who just wanted to know where Step Brothers is.

Tootsie, Dr. Strangelove, and Sideways follow, giving the list a nice mix of satire, character comedy, and movies your dad quotes annually.

Then you get deep cuts like Playtime and His Girl Friday, plus cult classics like The Heartbreak Kid and mockumentary legend This Is Spinal Tap. Rounding it out are It Happened One Night and Superbad, the lone modern teen comedy in the Top 20, representing an entire generation that believes McLovin is basically Shakespeare.

Is this list perfect? Absolutely not. Is ranking Airplane! outside the Top 10 a cinematic crime? Yes. Should we still enjoy arguing about it? Always.

Here’s the full Top 20 according to Variety:

The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! (1988)
Some Like It Hot (1959)
Annie Hall (1977)
The Great Dictator (1940)
Waiting for Guffman (1996)
Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)
Duck Soup (1933)
Fargo (1996)
Young Frankenstein (1974)
Groundhog Day (1993)
Sherlock Jr. (1924)
Tootsie (1982)
Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
Sideways (2004)
Playtime (1967)
His Girl Friday (1940)
The Heartbreak Kid (1972)
This Is Spinal Tap (1984)
It Happened One Night (1934)
Superbad (2007)

Feel free to yell your disagreements into the void. Variety probably can’t hear you over the sound of all that chaos they just caused.

The Four Commandments of In-Flight Eating

If you’ve ever cracked open a tuna fish sandwich at 35,000 feet—or sat near someone who did—then you already know: certain foods should never fly.

Planes are basically flying sardine cans with wings. Air circulation is minimal, escape options are nonexistent, and there’s no such thing as a personal exhaust fan. That’s why travel etiquette experts say when it comes to in-flight dining, the golden rule is simple: Keep it in your bubble. That means your noise, your elbows, and especially your smells.

According to one etiquette pro, there are four sacred rules for eating on a plane. And yes, they read kind of like airline commandments.

1. Thou shalt not bring smelly food aboard.
This is the big one. No tuna, no garlic-heavy leftovers, no sulfur-scented hard-boiled eggs, and definitely no fish of any kind. Think less “flavor explosion,” more “neutral and forgettable.” If your meal could clear a room, it doesn’t belong in the sky.

2. Thou shalt not eat like an animal.
Messy foods = a messy cabin. Sticky ribs, powdered donuts, spaghetti, and anything that drips or splatters should stay on the ground. If it requires a bib or three napkins minimum, rethink it.

3. Thou shalt be allergy-aware.
This one’s less about manners and more about safety. That innocent peanut butter snack might trigger someone else’s serious reaction in a confined space. Stick to safer options if you can.

4. Thou shalt not go full “open bar.”
Alcohol dehydrates you and hits harder at high altitudes. One too many mid-flight cocktails could leave you woozy, rude, or even kicked off the plane. So sip smart and hydrate often.

So what should you eat up there?

The best in-flight snacks are simple, compact, and inoffensive: crackers, pretzels, fruit (dried or fresh), a granola or protein bar, maybe a meat-and-cheese snack pack. Even a muffin or piece of chocolate is fair game.

Bottom line: if your food passes the “would I want to smell this in an elevator?” test, you’re probably safe. Happy flying—and even happier snacking.