The Most Popular Things to Eat After You’ve Been Dumped

Breakups hurt… but ice cream helps. Especially in Rhode Island.

If your New Year’s resolution involved giving up chocolate, carbs, or joy in general, here is a heads-up: a breakup will absolutely wreck that plan. When hearts get broken, people are not exactly reaching for a garden salad and calling it self-care.

The dating and relationship site LoveLifeAcademy.com dug into search data to figure out what Americans crave most after a breakup, and the results are about as comforting, indulgent, and carb-heavy as you would expect. (Because sadness burns a lot of emotional calories!)

The idea is simple. When relationships fall apart, we treat ourselves. And judging by the data, we treat ourselves with burgers, cheese, chocolate, and just about anything that pairs well with sweatpants and bad decisions.

Here is how breakup food cravings shake out across the map.

In South Dakota, burgers are the number one “breakup food.” Cake dominates in Louisiana, Mississippi, and Virginia, while candy takes the crown in Hawaii and Kentucky. In colder states like Alaska, Montana, and Wyoming, chicken noodle soup is the breakup MVP, which feels equal parts sad and wholesome.

Chocolate is Pennsylvania’s go-to emotional support food, while Iowa and Missouri turn straight to cookie dough. Utah and Washington want cookies, Maryland through D.C. opt for cupcakes, and Oklahoma and Arkansas are apparently pounding donuts through the pain.

Grilled cheese reigns supreme in Midwestern states like Indiana, Ohio, Wisconsin, and West Virginia. (Or “toasted cheese” as my Midwestern parents called it.) Mac and cheese takes over in Maine and New Hampshire, while pizza is the breakup food of choice in Connecticut and Massachusetts, which feels aggressively on brand.

Then there are the standouts. Nevada goes all-in on french fries. Delaware wants french toast. North Dakota and Vermont reach for garlic bread, which honestly might be the most emotionally honest choice on the list.

Ice cream only officially tops the list in Rhode Island, but let’s be real, it is probably sneaking into everyone else’s searches too. Milkshakes dominate across much of the Southeast, including Alabama, Florida, Georgia, and the Carolinas, proving that nothing soothes heartbreak quite like dairy-based denial.

And finally, tacos take the top spot in Idaho, Kansas, New Mexico, and Texas. Congratulations to those states for clearly understanding that tacos are always the antidote, even when love fails.

Breakups are rough, and Americans cope by eating their feelings, one comforting bite at a time. If that means abandoning resolutions temporarily, so be it. Healing takes time, and sometimes it takes garlic bread.

The “Pettiest” Reasons People Have Stopped Hooking Up

Relationships can end for all sorts of reasons… infidelity, distance, “it’s not you, it’s me.” But sometimes? It’s way dumber than that. Especially with casual dating, where the commitment is low and the deal-breakers are weirdly high.

People online have been sharing the pettiest reasons they stopped hooking up with someone, and honestly, some of these sound pretty fair.

Here are some highlights from the list:

  1. The Instagram Drama Queen. One guy said, “She got mad that I never viewed her Instagram Stories.” He barely used Instagram… which apparently was not acceptable.
  2. The Hat Girl. Someone thought his date’s oversized beret was just an occasional fashion statement. Nope. It was her entire personality.
  3. The Walking Jersey. A guy had his last name tattooed across his back. Romantic? Sure, if you’re in the NFL.
  4. The Rude One. They never said “thanks” to anyone, for anything. That’s a fast track to being single.
  5. The Loud Chewer. Do we even need to explain?
  6. The Shoe Enthusiast. One woman spent an entire first date talking about shoes. Three hours. On the second date, she immediately launched into another shoe monologue, and the guy walked out before dessert.
  7. The Litterbug. Someone dumped trash on the ground. Immediate dealbreaker.
  8. The Spoiler. One poor soul had the ending of The X-Files ruined. Unforgivable.
  9. The Bathroom Offender. “He always peed on my toilet and all around it.” Case closed.
  10. The Chatty Movie Buddy. They would not stop talking while watching shows or at the movies. Which is basically a crime.
  11. The Baby Talker. Nothing kills the mood faster than someone saying “pwease” and “tank you” in a baby voice.
  12. The Fresh Prince Test. One guy wanted a Carlton Banks phone case. She said no. He realized she didn’t share his sense of whimsy… and that was that.

So yes, sometimes breakups are petty. But sometimes “petty” is just code for, “I refuse to spend the rest of my life listening to you chew like a horse.”

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