Rich People Are Shockingly Good at Stealing from Self-Checkout

Have you ever had a self-checkout screen ask for a quantity, then looked at your bag of avocados, and thought, “Eh, ‘four.’ Close enough”?

Turns out a lot of people do exactly that, but here’s the twist: it is not the people struggling the most who are doing it. It is the people who definitely can afford the avocados.

A new report found that 27% of Americans admit they have intentionally skipped scanning an item at self-checkout. But when you break it down by income, the numbers get funnier and also slightly villainous.

Among households earning $100,000 or more, a full 40% admit they have stolen something at least once. That number drops to 27% for people making between $50,000 and $99,000. And only 17% of people making under $50,000 say they have done it.

So basically, the more money you have, the more likely you are to commit a misdemeanor over a bag of grapes.

This survey relies entirely on self-reporting, so it is possible rich people believe it’s less of a big deal. There is also no distinction between people who have done it once and people who treat self-checkout like an all-you-can-steal buffet.

The demographic split is just as wild. Men admit to cheating the system at a rate of 38%, compared to just 16% of women. Millennials are the boldest at 41%, closely followed by Gen Z at 37%. Gen X sits at 24%, and Boomers are basically saints with only 2% admitting they have done it.

Parents with young kids at home? Oh, they are absolutely stealing snacks. A giant 44% admit to it, compared to 7% of parents with adult kids and 19% of people without kids.

So why are people risking legal trouble over a $3 item?

The thieves were given 10 reasons to choose from, and the top answer was the economy. People said they are having trouble affording essentials because of “the current financial climate.” Next was frustration with recent price increases, followed by the general vibe of “prices feel unfair.”

After that, the excuses get a little philosophical. Some say self-checkout is essentially unpaid labor, so taking something small feels like compensation. Others think big stores are so profitable that the harm is minimal. And of course, plenty of people admit they steal because the chance of being caught is low.

17% of people justify stealing because there are long lines.

And 14% say they feel justified because they have been falsely accused of shoplifting before, which is… quite a plot twist.

So the next time you are at self-checkout and the machine says “unexpected item in the bagging area,” just know it is probably referring to someone’s conscience.

Amazon Drivers Hate Us for Ordering These Three Things

The holidays are a rough stretch for Amazon drivers, it’ just comes with the territory. So maybe take it a little easier on them the rest of the year.

An Amazon driver shared a list of the top three things she wishes we’d all stop ordering online, because they’re just so heavy. If you want your Amazon person to not hate you, consider tossing these in your grocery cart instead.

Kitty litter

Cat people, you’re on notice. It’s one of the most common – and most despised – deliveries. We go through it fast, so Amazon drivers are constantly lugging those bulky Chewy boxes up porches and stairs, all the while hoping their back doesn’t give out.

Dog food

Those 50-pound bags of kibble might be convenient to have dropped at your doorstep, but for drivers making 150+ stops per day, they’re another backbreaker.

Bottled water

Not those five-gallon jugs your Culligan man drops at your door – he knows what he signed up for. We’re talking about those cases of Poland Spring you like buying on Amazon because they’re $3 cheaper.

Amazon drivers in urban areas can deliver 250-300 packages a day.

So if you can’t live without these doorstep conveniences, at least consider tossing them a small tip around the holidays.

And come summer, maybe offer them a bottle of that water.

German Game Show Features Long-Distance Shopping Cart Returns

I tried this in a Kohl’s parking lot once and had to pay a guy $600 for denting Toyota Corolla.

German game show “Schlag den Star” (“Beat the Star”) has an excellent segment in which contestants must successfully return shopping carts from 30-50 feet away.

It took over 6,000 years, friends, but we may have finally reached peak civilization. How do we make this an Olympic sport?

The Surprising Psychology Behind “Just Keep It” Returns

Ever had Amazon tell you, “Just keep it,” when you tried to return something? That tiny thrill might be more than just a lucky break. It can also be the ultimate marketing move.

It creates brand loyalty.

A lot of the big-name retailers have adopted the “just keep it” return policy for certain low-cost items over the past few years, largely because the return shipping costs more than the item itself.

Now, a study from the University of Notre Dame found that letting customers keep those unwanted or defective items – known as “returnless returns” – actually makes them more loyal in the long run.

It fosters “brand warmth.”

Researchers found that those “keep it” returns trigger something called “brand warmth.” Basically, we start to think of the company as more generous, friendly, and trustworthy. That warm and fuzzy feeling sticks, and it can turn a one-time buyer into a lifelong customer.

The effect gets even better when the company frames it as the most eco-friendly option, or suggests you keep it and give it to someone else. That little nudge can make us feel like we’re part of something bigger, and keeps the brand in our good graces.

But there’s one thing that can ruin it.

Even when the product is defective, the goodwill isn’t completely lost – unless the company demands proof. Making a customer jump through hoops to prove something doesn’t work is where the good vibes go to die.

Amazon Prime “Day” Is Now 96 Hours Long

Despite the name, Amazon has officially confirmed Prime Day 2025 will last a whopping four days, from July 8th through the 11th.

That’s 96 hours of deals, doorbusters, and digital cart chaos. And yes, that’s still apparently considered a “day.”

The name hasn’t changed, but the math sure has.

Originally launched as a single-day event back in 2015, Prime Day started off as a 24-hour sales blitz. But Amazon doubled the length in 2017, and just doubled it again.

We’re now at four full days of shopping, and Amazon doesn’t seem interested in giving the event a more time-appropriate title. “Prime Week” anyone? (I’d even take “Prime Long Weekend.”)

It’s not even the only Prime Day anymore.

To make things even murkier, Amazon added a fall version in 2022 called “Prime Big Deal Days,” which most people just call “Fall Prime Day” or “October Prime Day.” Then they tossed in a “Big Spring Sale” every March, aka “Spring Prime Day.”

Throw in all the “early deals” that drop before each event and… yeah, it’s basically a never-ending discount cycle. So while Prime Day technically still exists, it might be more accurate to call it “Prime Year” at this point.

To be fair, the word “day” is subjective.

Sure, 24 hours is a day… on Earth. But a day on Venus lasts 5,832 hours. So if you know any higher-ups at Amazon, please let them know they could go way bigger with this.

Technically, they could make Amazon Prime Day 243 days long, and “day” would still be accurate assuming you’re logged on from the Second Rock from the Sun. (I hear the 5G is spotty up there though.)

10 Hilarious Gifts for the Dad Who Loves to Laugh

Let’s be honest: no one loves a good groan-worthy pun or oddly specific gadget more than Dad. This Father’s Day, skip the ties and give him something that’ll actually make him LOL. From novelty books to absurd socks and prank gifts, we’ve rounded up 10 quirky picks guaranteed to bring on a belly laugh.

1. Googly Eyes Emergency Kit

Because nothing says “emotionally stable father figure” like slapping googly eyes on a banana at 7AM. This pocket-sized tin of 150 eyeballs lets Dad bring everyday objects to life—so now even the remote control can judge your life choices.

Promising Review: “I’ve been putting these on everything at work. The office is littered with dozens of pairs of googly eyes, making it hard to throw away empty jumbo glue sticks or tissue boxes bc of the unwavering eye contact. It’s like throwing away a baby. Nobody knows who’s doing it, 10/10.” // Grace

Get a tin of 150 from Amazon for $8.95.

2. Banana Phone

Why get Dad Apple AirPods when you can get him a banana phone? This Bluetooth-enabled fruit connects to his smartphone, letting him chat away while everyone around questions his sanity. Bonus: 1% of proceeds go to gorilla conservation—so he’s not just monkeying around; he’s saving them too.

Promising Review: This is a great bluetooth handset. It doubles as a bluetooth speaker. It can be used to communicate with Alexa. I have used this with my phone and my Fire Max 11. I am also planning to use it with my computer. If you want a bluetooth handset that will drive you bananas this is the one for you. // Edward Balen

Get it on Amazon for $39.99

3. The Very Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes

He’s already telling bad jokes—now he has over 300 more. This book is the ultimate dad arsenal: a cringe-inducing collection of puns, groaners, and eye-rolls that will make you question why you ever gave him a platform. Guaranteed to make him laugh. Guaranteed to make you walk out of the room.

Promising review: I got this for my dad for Father’s Day, and he loved it! He didn’t stop telling dad jokes the rest of the day (I may have created a monster…) // E. Stewart

Get it on Amazon for $9.97

4. Dad Joke Pens

This hilarious set of imbossed pens is perfect for the father that is giving “dad joke energy,” but can never remember how it goes. Each one features a classic dad joke (and punchline), ensuring that his groan-worthy humor is (literally) always at hand. He’ll be cracking jokes and crossing off his to-do list with a smile.

Get it on Off the Wagon for $11.99

5. Chicken Feet Finger Puppets

Finally, the gift Dad never asked for but will absolutely abuse. These disturbingly detailed finger-sized chicken feet turn his hands into clucking nightmares. Great for pecking at the remote, scratching his head thoughtfully, or silently judging your life choices across the dinner table.

Promising review: I bought this product to make a Baba Yaga Hut for my Dungeons and Dragons game. Great product. Recommended! // M.E. Guth

Get it on Amazon for $6.94

6. Potty Putter Toilet Time Golf Game

For the dad who believes multitasking means combining bathroom breaks with golf practice, the Potty Putter is his new throne-side companion. This mini-golf set turns his bathroom into a putting green, ensuring that no moment is wasted—even the most private ones. Complete with a putting mat, mini club, two balls, and a “Do Not Disturb” sign, it’s the perfect gift for the man who truly has everything, including questionable time management skills.

Promising review: Had my dad cackling ! He’s always spending hours and hours trapped in the bathroom at home so for Christmas decided to give him something to do while he’s in there 😂 he bout rolled out of his chair. Perfect gag gift! // Abbie Reynolds

Get it on Amazon for $19.99

7. Funko Pop! Yourself

What do you get the dad who already thinks he’s a pop culture icon? A collectible version of himself, obviously. With Funko’s custom builder, you can immortalize Dad in 4 inches of plastic glory—complete with cargo shorts, grill tongs, and the smirk of a man who just told a joke about gas station hot dogs. It’s the perfect gift for the father who loves being the main character… even if he’s mostly just talking to the dog.

Get it on Funko for $40.00

8. Weird Medieval Guys Guide to the Dark Times

For the dad who thinks his jokes are timeless, this book proves that medieval humor was just as bizarre. Packed with peculiar illustrations and questionable advice from the Middle Ages, it’s a hilarious journey through history’s oddities. From naming your dog “Garlik” to surviving dragon encounters, it’s the perfect read for the father who appreciates the truly weird.

Promising review: I didn’t expect the book to be so beautifully designed and printed. Plus, the illustrations and author’s comments are hilarious. This book would make a great gift. // Chicago Lady

Get it on Amazon for $17.99

9. World’s Best Farter Socks

Finally, a pair of socks that honors Dad’s true legacy. These soft, comfy socks deliver the perfect punchline with every step. Great for Father’s Day or any day he needs a reminder that we know what the “World’s Best Father” trophy really says.

Get it on Off the Wagon for $12.99

10. A Bag of Nothing

For the dad who claims he wants “nothing” for Father’s Day, take him at his word with this hilarious gag gift. The “Bag of Nothing” is exactly that – a clear plastic bag with a label that reads, “A BAG OF NOTHING. Whether he’s a master of dad jokes or just hard to shop for, this gift delivers a laugh and a light-hearted reminder to be careful what he wishes for.

Promising review: My dad loved it. He got exactly what he asked for! // Madison Chaplin

Get it on Etsy for $3.20

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